Category Archives: Uncategorized

My Country? It's Like This

This prompt is answered in conjunction with the Malaysia Day on September 16. I'm an average Malaysian who was born in Malaysia, also live in Malaysia until now.

So you know nothing about Malaysia? Here' let me tell you a thing or two about it. Assuming you know where is Thailand, Singapore, Indonesia and Philippines, I can tell you Malaysia, on the map is located in the middle of those countries, in the middle of South East Asia. Yes, those countries are close neighbors to Malaysia; all of them have shared land or water borders with Malaysia. And for the record, Singapore was in fact part of Malaysia since it's independence from the British Empire until year 1969. Although the time Singapore spent as part of Malaysia was brief, it was fun and unforgettable.

Geographically, Malaysia is divided into two; West Malaysia which is comprised of 12 states in Malaysia Peninsula, and East Malaysia which is comprised of the states of Sabah and Sarawak (located to the north of the island of Borneo). The two land masses is divided by the South China Sea. Politically Malaysia is a federation of 14 states (Federal Territory is deemed as 1 free state in the federation). Our country practiced a form of democratic government known as constitutional monarchy, similar to the United Kingdom and Japan where we have our own king known as Yang Di-Pertuan Agong (literally means "Supreme Ruler") and a Prime Minister as the head of states. Our kings are elected, similar to the practice used in electing the Pope, although as opposed to the Pope, our kings are elected among hereditary sultans (the ruling royal families) from nine Malay states, all located in the Peninsula. For states without the sultans, they have Governors (locally known as "Yang Di-Pertua Negeri") appointed by the Council of Rulers. And unlike the Governors in the US, Governors in states in Malaysia have very little role in political system (just like the rest of the sultans) as the administration of individual states are directly under the jurisdiction of Chief Ministers.

Whenever I talk about my country I can't avoid to talk about its history as well. I think it's quite understandable why there are many people like yourself never heard about Malaysia before because our country has always been low profile for centuries. Actually it's not really our fault. We once had our own Golden Age too, during the reign of the Sultanate of Malacca. During that time The Malacca Empire was so prosperous; it covered almost half of South East Asia region. It was during this time Malaysia first become an Islamic nation and the religion has spread throughout this region since that time. We had hundred of years of relationship with the Chinese Empire and we were once the wealthiest trading nation in the world. It ended with the invasion by foreign powers from Europe such as the Portuguese and Netherlands. Later in the 18th and 19th century we were part of the British Empire and for a brief moment we were occupied by the Japanese armed forces during the World War II. Today Malacca is part of Malaysia as a free state, and because of the Portuguese occupation, Malacca has lost its hereditary line thus today Malacca has no sultan but instead it has the Governor.

Malaysia has a recorded history as far back as at least 2 thousand years. Although the locally available written historical sources may not dated as far as that time, there are foreign historical sources that have references to Malaysia that support this fact, mainly from China and India. Historically Malaysia also known by various names such as "Tanah Melayu" (literally "Land of the Malays"), The Spice Islands and a few more. To the ancient Chinese it was known as 'Nanyang' and to the westerns world it was known as The Golden Chersones as described by Ptolemy, and right before Malaysia was born, it was known internationally as The Malayan Federation or just Malaya. One of the main reason that strengthen the argument that Malaysia has long enough history is the reference given to Mount Ledang (located in Malacca) where in the western world it was once known as Mount Ophir. The world Ophir itself is believed to have been originated from the Hebrew language. Malaysia also was once a home for one ancient kingdom known as Langkasuka although its existence is still highly disputed among historians as some believe it has been existed before 10th century AD and through some unverified records, the king of Langkasuka once received a visit by the Roman envoys.

Throughout the history Malaysia always has a turbulent past due to the invasion of various foreign powers as mentioned earlier. Before the establishment of The Malacca Empire, this region has always in constant war between small kingdoms. Because of this local people has developed a way of life where they defended themselves with a unique martial art known as silat. Silat is unique to the Malay people (this includes the Indonesian) just like how kungfu/wushu is unique to the Chinese. Silat used to be taught only to the Malay people but since there are high demand from the non-Malays, they are now being taught to to them too. Right before the Portuguese invasion, there were only 2 most dominant empires in this region; the Malacca Empire and the Siam Empire. Perhaps if it's not because of the foreign invasion this region might have been unified by one of these two local powers because people in this region share many similarities in culture and language.

Well, it's true that Malaysia was once "The Land of The Malays" but under the British Empire, many immigrants, mostly from China and India has settled down and as a result Malaysia today has become one of the most diverse nation in the world. I'm not denying that there are racist people among us but most Malaysian today live in harmony and doesn't really care about the differences between ethnicity. Now we have the same goal; to make Malaysia a fully developed country by the year 2020. It's not an easy task to do and it can only be achieved by cooperation by all people regardless of their background.

Here I shall conclude that Malaysia may be new as a country but as a nation it has been existing for nearly 2000 years.

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How To Celebrate Eid (Raya), The Otaku Way


Eid is just in a matter of 1 or 2 days more. While there are different ways of celebrating it among Muslims in different nations throughout the world, still it one of the most celebrated festival in the Muslim world. However there’s catch, over the centuries the way of celebrating it has become too static, or should I say it tends to get boring all this time. Now I think what if we make a change to make it more interesting? By the way the suggestions below is made based on Malaysian Muslim’s view on Eid (a.k.a. ‘raya’ locally). Keep reading after the break.

Five ways of celebrating Eid, from otaku point of view:

1. Cosplay
When I mean cosplay here, of course I’m talking about the one that you can wear to go to Eid morning prayer, the one that you don’t have to discard too much to enable you to go to the mosque, and most importantly it covers your aurat so that you can pray. Of course you could wear gloves and boots too (though you’d still need to put them off in order to pray, except for head wear, as long as they don’t get in the way when you are in prostration position a.k.a. ‘sujud’) but no, don’t wear wigs during this time. Imagine wearing your Storm Troopers armor minus the helmet, the gloves and the boots, or you could wear your Darth Vade costume minus the helmet, gloves and boots too but you can still wear the mantel and you may replace the helmet with ‘songkok’. And you could as well wear a ‘samping’ too. Sorry girls but you can’t cosplay as Miku Hatsune during this time and yeah its too bad anime characters with veils (tudung) is almost non-existent, not to mention most female anime characters are sexy. Wearing kimono to replace your ‘baju kurung’ and ‘baju kebaya’ won’t help either since it would be too obvious because most conservative folks would see it as ‘too Japanese’ instead of relating it with anime (the don’t know what anime is to begin with). So girls, all that left to you might be wearing your raya dresses with color-theme associated with certain anime characters, such as black and green for Miku Hatsune, or if you’re creative enough you may redesign your favorite cosplay costumes to look like baju kurung/kebaya (for a sample, see the image at the bottom of this article). By the way you may still wear cosplay costumes for visiting friends during this time but certainly not for going to the mosque for Eid morning prayer.

2. Replace lemang with sushi rolls

Lemang sushi13
Lemang is is a Malay traditional food consisting of glutinous rice cooked with coconut milk in bamboo sticks which the innerside of the bamboo stick has been layered with banana leaves prior to the cooking process, which would wrap around the glutinous rice once they’re cooked. Lemang usually served in slices around 1-inch thick and usually eaten with ‘rendang’. Their rounded shape and the banana leaves that wrapped around them very much resembling sushi rolls wrapped around with seaweed. So I guess otaku would love to see this happen.

3. Replace Ketupat with Onigiri

ketupat onigiri1
Ketupat is another Malay traditional food, consisting of glutinous rice(man Malay do have lots of food consisting of glutinous rice a.k.a. ‘pulut’), or sometimes the normal rice, also cooked with coconut milk but instead being wrapped inside bamboo sticks they’re packed inside coconut leaf pouches, usually 2x2x1 inches in size that is made in a special way, giving ketupat a distinctive form of rice dumplings. They’re also usually eaten with ‘rendang’, usually served by cutting them into four symmetrical slices, or cut diagonally into two triangular-shaped slices. While onigiri (Japanese rice balls) is not really rounded like a ball (usually more triangular in shape) they share some similarities with ketupat, which I think otaku would love to see onigiri being served during Eid too.

4. Replace rendang with nikujaga

rendang p_nikujaga_000_l
Rendang is yet another Malay traditional food, which I’ve been mentioned a few times earlier. It is a type of ‘Malaysian curry’ (although the recipe usually has no ‘real’ curry being used). It is consisting of meat (beef/chicken/duck/mutton, everything but fish and seafood) cooked with coconut milk, various herbs and spices including chillies, which gives it a spicy taste. OK, they have no shared similarity with nikujaga except they’re made of meat, so I guess otaku would love to see nikujaga to replace this too. Besides nikujaga is relatively easier to cook too because it’s pretty much “beef soup/stew with potatoes and soy sauce”.

5. Greet your guests and visitors with ‘irashai’ together with the salam and Eid greetings
This is perhaps the least and easiest thing to do to celebrate raya/Eid in the otaku way. Usually during Eid when people come to our house they will give us a salam and wishes “selamat hari raya” (literally ‘”happy Eid”). During this moment you could say “irashaimase” or “youkoso” to them, followed by “douzo, douzo” to seat them. And if it’s you the one who pays a visit you could say “gomen kudasai” or “ojama shimasu” to the host.

How’s that? Alright, cosplaying in raya/Eid might be too striking, and greeting ‘irashai’ would sound too awkward too but if you’re really an otaku you wouldn’t care, right? Or perhaps you have better idea? Last but not least, Happy Eid and Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri from me, maaf zahir dan batin.


Shareware/payware/trialware or free vers…

Shareware/payware/trialware or free version or whatever you might call it is just an alternate, deceptive and sweet way for premium software/services to tell users “we give you craps for you to try them freely”. Sounds sweet isn’t it? The reality is most of those stuff are unnecessarily or excessively restrictive that it doesn’t make any sense to have them even if they’re free. In other words it would only makes sense if you buy/subscribe to the full version, which is actually kills the purpose of giving the user a free trial. Yeah, talking about bad evil capitalist business model.

And what about open source, you asked? I don’t mind about open source stuff from non-commercial entity but if they’re from strong IT companies with high reputation, I’ll doubt it, especially when they have the closed source stuff at the same time. It is because usually those kind of companies only open source stuff that is their craps and most probably won’t have good sales, making no difference whether they’re open source or not as they are usually less useful than they seem. Well, those kind of companies are opportunists who first let the crowd improving their craps and might closed source it again after things started favoring them and look profitable. Believe me it happened many times before, so it’s just normal for anybody, especially open source supporter like me to feel doubtful about it.

What I'm Avoiding

Generally speaking, I hate anything that gets in my way. Although I tend to avoid everything that I hate, if those things that I hate are happen to get in my way I'll face them because I feel like it. I'll keep harassing them until they get out of my way or until they follow my way. But all that has nothing to do with what I'm avoiding as per what explanation below.

Chuck Norris (1)

20 things that I'm avoiding:

1. Chuck Norris

He is the sum of all fears. Nobody in the right mind would voluntarily face him unless you're ready to be roundhouse-kicked out from this universe to another dimension. By the way he is the only one here that I avoid not because I hate him but rather because he's too awesome.

2. Gays (that includes lesbos, yaoi and yuri)

Because I'll never know when they will assault me. Actually all gays should never be born in the first place because it's hypocritical if you are happy for being born but you yourself will never reproduce with your same-sex partner.

3. Atheists (and/or free thinkers, but not including pagans)

All they're doing is bitching and complaining and whining about God laws governing them, such as restrictions for gay marriage. Heck! Marriage is a religion thing to begin with so why must they being noisy about it when it has nothing to do with what they believe?

4. iFags (a.k.a. Apple fanboys/loyalists)

They think they are special just because they own a Mac/iPod/iPhone/iPad. Well, I'm not stylish (or stupid) enough to own iProducts. Even my T-shirts are bought from roadside stalls where I can get 3 for only 10 bucks.

5. Facebook

Although I used to be a Fagsbook user too it doesn't mean I love it to the point that I will never leave it. With tons of online doppelgangers inside it can be too annoying when people keep mistaking me as their acquaintance.

6. Feminazi

I don't mind with feminists if they keep it to the moderate level but most of the time those extremists feminazis will relate everything that seems not favoring their kind as "discrimination against women" even if it's just a simple thing like a guy trying to correct his girlfriend's mistakes by telling her what she's supposed to do (purely from his point of view, without resorting to any violence at all).

7. CLI (it stands for Command Line Interface, not the cli that you know)

I don't see any reason to prefer CLI over GUI (Graphical User Interface) when GUI is available. It may be faster and easier to code than GUI but with only a few milliseconds difference, coupled with the fact that computers today are powerful enough that some of them reaching the point of being overkill, it doesn't make sense anymore for power user to keep relying on it.

8. Bustin Jieber, Gady Laga, Ciley Myrus, Ladam Ambert (blahblah! You name it)

The words are not enough for me to describe just how "hate-able" those people are that I have to 'avoid' writing their names properly. Perhaps it's enough if I just say that by default all American artists deserve a rejection from me. Of course there are a few exceptions but this is only applicable to those who are exceptionally good, though that kind of artists are endangered species that are as rare as chicken's teeth.

9. Korean entertainment

It's not that I hate them by default but I can't easily forget how they steal everybody's attention while people are still enjoying Japanese entertainment (not limited to J-drama and J-rock/J-pop songs). If not people might have better terms with anime today. And I can't understand why there are significant number of anime fans like them as well when they have nothing to do with anime in the first place. Maybe those people are just confused between Korean and Japanese?

10. You

Yes, you. I hate you and I found that everything about you is "hate-able" like your musical preferences, the anime you watch, your friends, how you speak/write, your reactions towards me and even the websites you visit. I hate you too much to the point that I have to avoid writing down the names of all of you here, so it can't be helped. However you should feel 'honored' for being hated by me, because it's not easy to get my hate. In fact some people are dying or even died just for trying to get me to hate them. Yes, those people just love to be hated by me, and in return, along with the hatred, I respect them too for struggling for my hate and living up to their masochistic nature.

"HEY HALFEY WHERE ARE THE OTHER 10 DAMMIT?!" you asked? Sorry but I hate them too much that I have to 'avoid' writing them here as well.

(13/30 people avoid me for no apparent/real reason or simply just because they can't afford to face me alive)

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My Stance In Swear Words, Goshdarnit

I have give my thoughts previously about swear words. This is the Part II of it, and this time I won’t hold back, so if you find any ‘unmasked’ vulgarities below, please bear in mind that they are solely for the purpose of explanation, not to piss off anybody.

Fuck you

Lets start with the most popular swear word, ‘fuck’. I still don’t understand why people, especially the Americans like to use this words all the time to describe almost everything. For example “That’s fucking weird” or “There’s so fucking many of them out there”. Is the word ‘fuck’ an adjective to begin with? No, its a verb, an action, which means in the examples above, the word ‘fuck’ is being used in inappropriate situations. No, I must say the word fuck there is a mistake. Oh so stupid people who use it that way.

And there’s another situation where people tend to use the word ‘fuck’ wrongly. For example “Fuck (insert some subject here)!”. Usually it’s used that way to show displease or hatred. But then again does that word being used properly here? Fucking is something that people, including me loves to do. I mean who doesn’t like to fuck? So if fucking is something that feels good then why must people use it as swear words? Oh so stupid people who use it that way (again).

Sometimes I wonder why it has to be the word ‘fuck’ there when it doesn’t really serve any mean or purpose? Why can’t just replace it with something else like “What the heck you’re doing?” instead of “What the fuck you’re doing?”. Or perhaps one can just use any meaningless word to substitute the word fuck there if heightened expression is really needed here, for instance “What the higckt you’re doing?” (the word ‘higckt’ has no real meaning here).

I’m far from finished. I’m pretty sure many of you have heard the phrase “holy shit”. In terms of vulgarity level, it may be just below the word ‘fuck’ but it is still as stupid as using the word fuck in situations given above. Why stupid? Lets do some analysis word by word here. Holy is, as far as I know is similar to sacred. Shit is you know what, which is a total opposite of sacred. So why must those words have to be combined together as a mean to swear when they are contradicting each other. Oh so stupid people who use it that way (it will never end).

(4/7 people who like to use the swear word ‘fuck’ are actually unable to fuck and can’t get laid – literally)

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My Superhero’s Special Power

If you were a superhero, what special power would I like to have? Before anything else I should ask myself what kind of superhero I'd like to be? The one with single superpower (like the X-Men) or the one with multiple superpowers (like Superman)? Lets perform some analysis first before I can decide any further.

Superheroes go shopping

Take a look at Superman. Aside from his stupidity of wearing the underwear on the outside, how many superpowers does he has? He is invincible, he can fly, he has this deadly heat ray coming out from his eyes, he can see through everything, and he can live in outer space vacuum (he can live without breathing! – not sure to what extent though). So how many superpowers are there? There are at least five! Even Spiderman has at least two superpowers (to cling at walls like spider and even can produce spider web just like spider, albeit from his wrists instead of his abdomen).

So what if I have at least 5 superpowers too? If I'm given the chance to pick and choose what kind of superpowers I'd like to have, then here are what they would be:

1. The power to create and destroy

With this power I can create something from nothing or vice versa (turn something into nothingness). In battle I can just defeat my enemies by destroying their existence down to the quantum level.

2. The power to pull and push things

This power is similar to telekinesis but only limited to draw things towards me or pushing them away from me. Useful to stop the bullets from hitting me (literally makes me almost invincible) and return them back to the people who shoots me. I can also use this power to fly and cling to walls/ceilings as well as disarming my enemies.

3. Remove superpowers from villains and turn them into good people

Yes, instead of engaging in unnecessary battles why can't just turn your enemies into good people? This is the superpower all superheroes need.

4. The ability to retrieve any publicly available information in real time without the need of mediums like books/internet.

Remember McGuyver? See how cool he was with all his knowledge to solve problems? Imagine where we're pushed to a dead end to find a solution and this is where this 'superpower' is really needed.

5. The power to make any girls/women to fall in love with me.

This is self explanatory. I mean which male superheroes doesn't have woman behind them, just like the saying "Behind every successful men, there's a woman". Besides, as far as I can remember, there's no gay superhero so far.

But everybody knows virtually any superheroes have weaknesses. Not even Superman is spared as he is also so damn weak against the cryptonite. So what about me? In fact all of my superpowers are also my major weaknesses. Here are the explanations:

1. Although I can create something from nothing and turn anything into nothingness, it only works that way. It's impossible for me to turn something into other things directly, like turning my enemies into piles of gold bars.

2. Like I said, the power to pull or push something is not really telekinesis because I can't exactly move things remotely from point A to point B, unless the point B is located in straight line from me to point A (I mean I can't remotely move things vertically or sideways but only back and forth). Besides this superpower is not as cool as teleporting.

3. I maybe can turn villains into good people but they will lost their superpowers in the process, which might have been useful if they turned into my allies. Not only that, the definition of "good people" here really depends on me, which means they might still a bad people to some other people even after all the process.

4. Knowledge like McGuyver is power but it only works if there are enough tools. Of course I can just create any tools that I need from nothingness but it's not 100% guaranteed that I'll make the accurate tools if I have little experience in the problems I'm going to solve. And knowing things doesn't mean I mastered them too.

5. To make any girls/women to fall in love with me, I need a notebook, I need to know their face and their name too. I'd need to write down their names and the reasons/situations before any romantic events could take place. There's no guarantee how long the relationship will last (it does not guarantee I'll have great sex), and it won't work if the female also has superpower (in other words, this power is only applicable to normal females).

Actually I'd like to use the notebook (like the manga "Death Note") for my superpower #3 but you know villains always disguised themselves in costumes like superheroes too so there's no way I could know instantly their true identity without engaging myself in battles first (take note that their true identity is not publicly available so I can't use my superpower #4 either). So if I really need to avoid any battles, turning them straight away into good people is the only choice I can make.

(1/2 female villains fell in love with me after first encounter. The other half committed suicide)

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My Dream House

This is about the home of my dream. Everybody has their own dream home, I mean who doesn’t? People has always dreaming a perfect and ideal home for their life, even if it does not appear to be ‘perfect’ to other people. Perfect here doesn’t have to be 100% because for most people, what they need is a “just enough” home with roof, and rooms, as long as it does provide a shelter for them. Here is mine. Read on.

Borudjerdis’ House (Kashan)

I have three kind of dream houses. The first one is a double-storey detached house with a special design, combination of American and Japanese style. American design being adopted here is the underground water cooling system, the use of insulation layer in the walls (to keep the house cool from the heat of tropical climate here) and the ‘gateless’ frontage, where guests and visitors can go straight to my doorstep instead of ringing the bell from outside of the gate. I feel it’s friendlier that way for them. For the cars, instead of parking them in the car porches, I’ll park them in the garage, just like what the Americans do.

For the Japanese style, I’d like to adopt their distinctive doorway/hallway/corridor style. Unlike the Americans, we Asian does not bring shoes inside the house and leave them at the doorstep. However there’s one thing that separates the Japanese from the rest of other Asians are who leave the shoes outside the house, the Japanese have special place for shoes inside the house, located just behind the main door. That’s what I’m talking about. And I don’t mean to leave our local house design. The kitchen will be made completely separated from the living room, and restrooms will not share the same place with bedrooms.

Speaking about bedrooms, I prefer there to be at least 4 bedrooms to be ideal. The master bedroom for mom and dad, one room for the boys, one room for the girls and another room reserved for the guests. For rest rooms, I’d like to make two sets of them. What I mean by ‘set’ here is one room will be consisted of separate three parts; toilet, bathroom and ‘washroom’. For other cultures, washroom may be the same as toilet but for the local people here it is where we do general washings that is not related to bathing. Last but not least, in a tropical country here, a roof ventilator is a must to complement the underground water cooling system I mentioned earlier.

So where I would like to place the house? I am dreaming of a peaceful neighborhood with friendly neighbors, and I can virtually get everything I want just from a stone-throw away, or at least a walking distance to the stores that can provide me almost everything that I need (from anime, manga, games, computers, software, books, foods, clothes, etc.). It would be better too if it’s within a walking distance from my workplace, and since I’m the online-type person, a free public wifi access is a plus point as well. It may not offer the best quality but it’s free and at least I can stay online most of the time without having to worry about the expensive internet bills.

Here is my dream house number two. It is an apartment in the middle of the city, where I can have a beautiful kaleidoscopic night view of the city from the windows. The apartment doesn’t have to be a luxury one, even a cheap one with just one bedroom (with own kitchen and restroom) for a bachelor like me is enough (I can convert the living room into a bedroom for guests if there’s a need to), or three bedrooms for family people. I’m also fine if it’s just a residential floor in a 3 or 4-storey shophouse unit. Just like my dream house number one above, I’d appreciate it if there’s a free public wifi access so I can cut the expenditure for the internet.

And since it’s in a middle of a city I’d prefer it to be as close as possible to a convenience store. I’d want a 24-hours convenience store too but yeah this kind of store always sell their goods at more expensive price. A shopping complex within a walking distance is a good thing to where I can do window shopping whenever I feel like it. I’ll need a hypermarket nearby too to buy fresh ingredients/foods. Also a restaurant (preferably a 24-hours one), a hardware store and a laundry shop is a must too, because I’ll definitely need them.

Lastly for my dream house number three (the most unrealistic one), it is a small mansion on a parcel of land with an area no less than a football/soccer field. Yes, a piece of land enough to build a medium-sized stadium would be ideal. In the middle of the land there is the 4-storey house building with at least four rooms (for various purposes including bedrooms and workspace) in each floor. There will be numbers of maids and butlers to serve me, and enough bodyguards to keep an eye for my security. I have drivers and cars to take me to virtually any destination I want. In front of the mansion there are gardeners tending to keep the big landscape beautiful all year long. There are also small ponds and fountains at both left and right side of the house. Finally, a private swimming pool behind the house where I can dive in whenever I like or I can just organize a swimsuit party there every weekend.

(9/16 of my guests never know the exact location of my house)

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